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Helping Someone With Alcohol Recovery in Kona

  • By John Burke

  • June 23, 2022

Do you have a friend or family member who has become addicted to alcohol? Perhaps it is your significant other? Or maybe you got here by searching for “alcohol recovery near me in Kona” because you are concerned about a colleague or neighbor. Whoever the person is that you are concerned about, we are glad you are here. They are lucky to have someone looking out for them. Understanding alcoholism when you aren’t the one that has it can be difficult. But your willingness to accept that it is a serious and difficult illness, even if it doesn’t make sense to you, is meaningful.

Ways to help your loved one with alcohol recovery in Kona

Be educated on addiction and recovery

Addiction and alcoholism are complex. For many people who have alcohol use disorder, recovery is very challenging. It’s not enough to tell them to simply stop using. While choosing to drink or not drink may be easy for you, it may not even be a choice for the person you are concerned for. Once addiction has taken hold of someone, the power of choice has been removed. If stopping and staying stopped were easy, they would’ve done it a long time ago. So one of the best ways to help your loved one is to educate yourself on various aspects of alcoholism and recovery. You can learn about the psychological effect of addiction, the potential triggers, health issues, enablement, and the recovery process. This will also allow you to understand and relate to them, as well as being better equipped to help them.

Make changes to support your loved one recover

It’s vital that your loved one feels your support in their journey. Especially in their first months of rehab. These aren’t “forever” changes, just tips on being supportive while your loved one builds a strong foundation. Here are some ways that you can make changes to support them:

  • Remove all alcohol from the home
  • Avoid gatherings where other people are drinking alcohol
  • Find new activities to do together that don’t involve drinking
  • Focus on different or new aspects of life
  • Build relationships with sober friends

Set boundaries

There are situations where a concerned family or friend will set boundaries with the recovering party. These boundaries range from who the person is allowed to see or when they should be home by, to what they are expected to do around the house or what to do with their money. One of the pitfalls with boundaries is that they get set with the idea of keeping the other person safe. But the real idea behind these boundaries is not just about keeping the other person safe, but rather how to help the non-addicted person feel like they are taking care of their own self as well. For example: perhaps you don’t feel comfortable with your loved one bringing drunk friends home because it is your private sanctuary. Or maybe you have told them they need to pay rent because you feel resentful about working full time while they party.

These are examples of ways that one person sets a boundary in order to respect their own needs, instead of letting someone else’s needs or desires trump their own. But all too often in relationships with an addicted individual, the boundaries get violated, and nothing happens. If a boundary of yours is crossed or broken and there are no repercussions for the alcoholic, then you are officially enabling them. You might feel like letting them off the hook is loving, or an example of patience, when in reality it is allowing them to believe that you’re not serious with your boundaries and its not necessary to respect you. The end result is always that they continue performing the same behaviors, and you end up upset. Additionally, this will often leads to them overstepping more limits in the future. So you must be clear and firm on your boundaries. At first, there may be some anger and bitterness. But eventually, they will realize how big of a help those boundaries are.

Find support

It would be almost impossible for you to support someone else if you don’t get proper support for yourself. Useful avenues of support include therapy, counseling, or activities such as yoga. But many people who are loved ones of recovering addicts find much-needed support through dedicated support groups, either online or in person. These groups have meetings where they can provide emotional support, friendship, understanding, wisdom, and even helpful tips. These groups include Al-Anon and SMART Recovery. If you’re from Kona, Hawaii, you can also search for “alcoholic support near me in Kona” to find alcohol recovery support groups nearby.

Help your loved one recover

Of course, one of the best methods of support you can give a recovering loved one is the encouragement to start their journey in an alcohol recovery home. It provides them with a safe and comfortable place to commence their clean and sober journey. We at Honu House Hawaii are based in Kona and can help your loved one on their journey to sobriety. Our friendly and helpful team will ensure that they are well taken care of. Recovery from alcoholism takes a village. You don’t need to, and shouldn’t, be the only person helping them down this path. Let’s do this together. Reach out to us today.